Jerry: I'm popular, but i'm not happy

[Qinai de Jerry]

Thanks to hermaning of [e-mail]
thanks to lauren @ f4_internationalfc-philppines
credit to xiujuan of onlyf4
thanks to mikayla lee of onlyjerry
skyblue too!

Shanghai Wednesday (29th Sept 2004)

Jerry: I'm popular, but i'm not happy

Recently, Jerry appears in Shanghai for his solo
album, "Di Yi Ci" promo. The interview became this
handsome hunk's real talk risk. He says his
straightfoward character brought him hurt in this
circle, and stories before he came into the
circle.....

Carrying the bad weight, And to pursue Perfection

Reporter : What do you think was the biggest problem
for you when you recorded this album ?

Jerry : (quiet, thinking, using his eyes "kiss the
crew with his expressions)

Reporter : Any happy things happened ?

Jerry : (continued to be quiet, using sad __expression
to look at the reporter)

Reporter : Do you think this album helped you to do
whatever you wanted to do well ?

Jerry : (sighs)Not out yet, i think the 2nd and 3rd
one would show it. (keeps quiet)

Reporter : I want to ask ..em...do you need a rest ?
Don't think too much about the late incident that
happened at the media press just now.

Jerry : No, but i really don't wish to be continued to
be mistaken. I'm feeling really bored, i just want to
do my job, i hope there won't be unfair sayings or
irresponsible sayings of me again, like that i would
feel.....(cannot continue)

Crew : Jerry is someone who pursue's perfection, Jerry
do you need a rest ?

Jerry : No, let's continue

Reporter : Your character is very straightfoward, is
this a blockway in this entertainment circle ?

Jerry : (broke the reporter's speech) Of course it's a
blockway, i'm very sure of it, because these 2 3
years, i offend people easily. Although i'm looking
for a balanced point, how can i use all my effort not
to offend people, but also to let people around me
think i'm not doing it well, in the end, it's all my
fault. I have to learn my lessons from all these
experiences time and time again.

Reporter : What do you have to have fans to like you
so much, is it your straight-fowardness ?

Jerry : I really don't know if you ask me. Speaking
with conscience, i'm only liked by a group of people,
to say, i'm also trying my very best to do what i'm
supposed to do, thus, why am i more up-tight about the
incident just now, is because i hope everyone can
understand. I kept repeating the misunderstood mistake
to everyone, the bad weight i'm carrying is already
very huge, many are actually not needed.

If today you say i can't act well, and can't sing
well, i'm very willing to hear everyone's critism.
Because, it's the power to make me improve. However,
today, i have reached here very early to make
preparations, i was waiting for everyone, in the end,
i'm mistaken again, maybe i feel that...(can't
continue again)

Cang Sang and Unhappy

Reporter : The Shua Ban Head that you have when you
just step in to this circle, and the pineapple head
that you have in Meteor Garden, and the let-down
coloured hair now, what one do you like best ?

Jerry : Young, when the hair was short. That's called
Shua Ban head ? (laughs lightly) I just call it short
hair, i find that i look happier at that time, frankly
speaking, i'm a boy who love basketball. Now, i'm in
this circle for 2 to 3 years, i've seen many things,
i'm more cang sang. When i wake up in the morning
washing my face, i look into the mirror to see this
person, why am i so shagged ? I feel that i'm getting
more and more unhappy. Seeing the old photos, i wished
i could find back the old me who didn't know anything
and only love to play basketball.

Reporter : Have F3 heard you album ?

Jerry : When i left Taiwan, they have not heard it.
But, after they hear it, Zaizai and Vanness joked and
said, they found it not bad, Vanness used a very sexy
voice to say this album is good. Maybe because we were
used to playing around, this to me was gross, i told
him not to be such a sissy. (laughs)

Reporter : Compared to F3, what good and bad points do
you think you have ?

Jerry : I find that i don't have good points. I'm a
more nervous person, sometimes, i really want to do my
own part well and i get angry when i cannot do so. I
have to learn from the other 3, Zaizai is just like my
younger brother, very adorable. Vanness is great, can
sing, can dance and can speak english.

Reporter : In F3, who are you closest to ?

Jerry : At first, i'm all right with the 3. Privately,
after that it was Zaizai , Vanness because Ken went to
China to flim and we drifted apart.

Mom's thought the hard days

Reporter : In the Zhang Qing Fang's interview show,
you cried the moment you talked about your mom. Now
that you have money, is your mom still as thrifty as
before ?

Jerry : This question is asked very well. My mom does
read newspapers articles at times, thus i want to use
the interviews to let her know. Her opinions still has
not changed, she is still like the past, because we
have suffered before, mama is very thrifty towards
money including food. My way is to buy lots of things
for her, she would say i'm so wasteful, but i know,
what i do would make her eat the tonics, this way, i
don't have to worry for her.

In the past, as mama needs to take care of us, she
overworked, thus her health have not been very good. I
hope to let her know to take care of her health. The
only thing i'm not happy with her now is to see the
doctor. I know quite a few good doctors, the expenses
are a little higher. After i bring her there once,
she'll say it's so expensive, let's not go there
again, we'll see the normal doctors. But, i'm so busy,
i cannot take care of mama properly, i also hope to
let myself not worry so much, hoping her health would
continu to be good.

Reporter : You give the money you earn to your mom ?

Jerry : Of course ! But, just a portion, because i'm
afraid she'll get cheated outside. We came from a
village to Taiwan, So , my mom is quite honest. My mom
told me she was being robbed of her purse before on
the road.

Product being packaged ?

Reporter : What do you see in yourself ?

Jerry : Nothing, maybe it's the determination.

Reporter : Because of your determination, your fans
are determined too. I heard that there are fans who
queue overnight for you in Beijing.

Jerry : I hope everyone can use a relax way to meet
me. I hope everyone likes me, is the determined way
which i do things. I have to admit i don't know how to
be a good person, sometimes , i just innocently want
to do things well but i hurt the people around me.
Just now when i said i was nervous, i have to say
sorry, i did not explain it well.

Reporter : What if you determination doesn't carry
back any response ? For example, you worked hard to do
your album but it doesn't get seen, would you give up
?

Jerry : In the past, i have done things with more
effort, but people who don't like me still doesn't
like me. I can only do to let those people to realise
one day, Jerry Yan is a little different, he has
improve, and i'll be satisfied. To myself, i have to
do better than the Jerry Yan in F4 3 years back. I
hope people don't think that, "Jerry is just a product
packaged back. Whatever he do is because people around
him asks him to do that, and he doesn't have any
feelings." If i'm like that, no matter how well i do,
Jerry Yan's marks can only be 50 marks, but at least
now, i know i've passed. Although it's not the best,
at least i've worked hard to bring out the best me, to
let others know i have a different place by the rest.

Thanks to Shanghai Wednesday.